• Your potted plants stay alive.
• Having sex in a twin-sized bed is absurd.
• You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
• 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to sleep.
• You hear your favorite song on the elevator at work.
• You carry an umbrella.
• You watch the Weather Channel.
• Your friends marry and divorce instead of hook-up and break-up.
• You go from 130 days of vacation time to 7.
• Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as 'dressed up'
• You're the one calling the police because those damn kids next door don't know how to turn down the stereo.
• Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
• You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
• Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
• You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonalds.
• Sleeping on the couch is a no-no.
• You no longer take naps from noon to 6 p.m.
• Dinner and a movie - The whole date instead of the beginning of one.
• MTV News is no longer your primary source for information.
• You go to the drugstore for Ibuprofen and antacids, not condoms and pregnancy test kits.
• A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer 'pretty good stuff'.
• You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time.
• Grocery lists are longer than

• 'I just can't drink the way I used to' replaces 'I'm never going to drink that much again'
• Over 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
• You don't get liquored up at home, to save money, before going to a bar.
• The end........

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